Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Let It Go



I have never been a pack rat. I don’t collect things or keep things that have no use. I have never been one with regrets, the past is in the past and I don’t let it weigh me down. And yet, this year, I have learned three very powerful words:

Let it go.

If you can fix it, do. If you can change it, do. If you can’t, let it go.


I like to have themes in my year. In 2012, I said “Enjoy the process.” And in 2013, I planned to use “Never be afraid of hard work.”

But, magically, a new theme emerged right when I needed it most. I didn’t plan for the phrase of 2013 to be Let It Go, but it was.

My older sister has changed her phone number, refuses to speak to us, and is very possibly in an abusive relationship. Yet I cannot help her.

Let it go.

My Nana’s long battle with pulmonary fibrosis finally ended and she died peacefully at home surrounded by family. Except me. I was 5000 miles away.

Let it go.

My seven year journey for a PhD ended with the words I dreamed of hearing, “Congratulations, Dr. Whitener.” That struggle is over.

Let it go.

When the weight of life threatened to suffocate me into inaction, pity, grief, guilt, the words came, “Let it go.”

Thank you, 2013, for delivering such a powerful mantra. Thank you for giving me the courage to move on.


Today my younger sister and I are running a 10k together. We’re doing it because we can. Because it’s there, we’re fit, and it’s the right way to say, “Let it go,” to this year where pushing against the brick wall didn’t get us anywhere.

(As if it ever had before.)

Next year we’ll run 500 miles. It’s the distance between our houses and the right mileage for our skill level. We’ll continue to improve and grow and get faster and stronger.

But above all, we’ll continue to heal, to learn, to try, and to encourage one another to do the same.

As a writer, I should be cynical and snarky about motivational phrases and crappy mantras. But I’m not. I think words are the most powerful tool I have. 

I love words. 

I love the way they mean different things in different circumstances, the way they move through my life with the right nudge and pull.

Sometimes a phrase will just speak to me, as if it were written just for me.

This year that phrase was, “Let it go.” Unclench. Release. Forgive. Forget. Move on. Thanks, 2013.
 
Come on in, 2014. What’s next?

10 comments:

  1. As a long-time yogi, the goal is not to pray for things but pray for the removal of things. Mostly our own erroneous mental constructs...because we can only hear the message that we are expecting, not the one the other person is trying to express.

    May 2014 be a year of peace & blessings for you and yours.

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    1. Thanks, Lori. I am always grateful for the many lessons I learn and changes I undergo as a result of challenges. Removal of obstacles is a constant mantra for me. Glad to see you on Clemson Road!

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  2. Great and touching post, Kasie. For me, "Let it Go" has been easier said than done. When that happens, it helps to grab onto something else — like the 10K with your younger sister. Way to go!

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    1. Hi, Elizabeth. I am definitely a "what's next?" kind of gal, too.

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  3. Yes! Yes! Yes! We all need to live by the words, "Let it go." I have come to my own "Let it go" moment today because of you, Kristen, and my daddy. I am determined to let go of the many things which have weighed me down in 2013. You know what many of those things are and I hope when I try to pick those things back up and carry them you will remind me to "let it go." I love you, Kasie AND I JUST KNOW 2014 IS GOING TO BE OUR BEST YEAR YET!

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    1. Thanks, mom. As with all lessons, true adoption requires action. Every day, repeated as necessary.

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  4. What a great way to start the new year! For me, I'm looking forward to 2014, and letting go of what weighed on me in 2013, but remembering the triumphs during difficult times.

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    1. Yes! Triumph can be an excellent motivator: "I know I can do this, I have triumphed before!"

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  5. You're so right. I'm too learning the "let it go" mantra. I'm glad I'm not the only one learning this. Best of luck in the new year Dr. Whitener :)

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