Digging for the Pony

Taking a positive perspective on things has never been a problem for me. I have been a glass-half-fuller my whole life. 

When we were kids my dad used to tell a story about two sisters. One was an eternal optimist, the other a pessimist. These sisters were supposed to be me and my younger sis.

One day the dad puts the two girls in separate rooms. The pessimist, we’ll call her Kristen, in a room full of toys and the optimist, we’ll call her Kasie, in a room full of manure.

It’s important to note here that my sister and I are not really the caricatures the story makes us out to be. We are both governed by a tremendous logic that tries to honestly weigh the odds and make calculated decisions.

That said I am more likely to think things will turn out okay and Kristen more likely to expect imminent disaster.

Anyway, after an hour the father returns
to Kristen’s room to find her crying over all the new toys. When he asks her why she’s crying, she responds, “These aren’t my toys and I just know I’ll break one.”

The father shakes his head and goes to check on the optimist.

When he gets to Kasie’s room, she’s digging.

“Kasie!” he says, “what are you doing?”

She’s moving manure around, pushing piles to reveal what’s underneath.  Without stopping, she says, “I just know there must be a pony in here.”

See it for what it is

The key to optimism is not an altered state of reality. It’s not about blind faith that someone will intervene to create a happy ending. It’s not even about being prepared to make the best of a bad situation.

Recently, when confronted with a situation out of which no good could possibly come, I doubted my optimism. I thought how childish and simplistic I had been trying to make things. Of course people would be hurt, lives would be changed, and these things were difficult. But difficult does not mean impossible.

So optimism, really, is about finding what is possible and pursuing that with every effort you have available to you. In many cases, the efforts of others are required for the ideal outcome. You may not have their efforts available to you. So, what? Do you wait around for others to act? Bemoan your inability to move forward?

I don’t.

Not ever.

Do something about it

Optimism is about finding what is possible and then pursuing it with every effort you have available to you. If the efforts of others are not available, you have to pursue possible without them.

Leave them behind.

I’ve written about courage before. I’ve said change takes courage. Changing your life takes courage. You must be willing to fail to be able to try.

Failure could happen. But it might not.

Optimism is about seeing what is possible and then pursuing it. Because for every opportunity to fail, there is an opportunity to succeed.(The exact ratio is a little tricky. Someday I'll write about what I call stacking the deck.)

Is this life-coachy enough? Motivational-posteresque?

Try this: Fail. Don’t fail. No one cares. The only person truly invested in the decision you make is you. Everyone else is peripheral. Other people will just get over you.

So get over yourself.

Then make a decision.

A great blogpost about the “sometimes” in our lives had this to say: Sometimes you don’t know all the facts and you don’t have all the answers but you still have to make a decision.

Decide to pursue the best possible outcome.

Be an optimist about that room full of manure. If for no other reason than, pony or not, the digging matters.

What do you do in a room full of manure? Dig? Pray for rescue? Or give up?