Wednesday, June 20, 2018

Love Builds Confidence

Going into the archives for some classic blogs to get this blog resurrected. It's no longer The 41st Year and Life on Clemson Road is, as always, an incredible Journey.

From May 2016:

For Mother’s Day, Hollie gave me a picture card she’d drawn in school. It said: 

You like to read and write with me, write and read, write and read, write and read. You work every day, work, work, work, work. You watch movies and shows with me, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch. You eat lunch with me on Saturday, eat, eat, eat. I love u!

Beneath it was a picture of two equally-sized people wearing orange, holding books, and standing near a restaurant booth. On the table was a hot dog (hers) and a glass of wine (mine).

My first thought was, “Way to hit that word count, girl!”

My second was, “Hollie really knows me.”

I’ve not been hiding myself from her. She knows I love to read and write. She knows I love to watch movies and Animaniacs. She knows Saturdays are our date days and that during lunch she can have sweet tea and I’ll be drinking wine.

I am who I am.

Being myself with Hollie is how I’m showing her that it’s okay for her to be herself, too.

There are times when I have to be a certain version of myself. I’m comfortable with roles and responsibilities. I understand that what needs to be done is not always what I want to be doing.

Authentic leadership comes from a place that recognizes who I am, flaws, faults, talent, and all. And it infuses that person into every role. Even when the role requires I be more.

For example, I am an extrovert and tend to do a lot of talking to find my way through a dilemma. With customers, though, I keep most of my “finding” to myself. I listen to them speak, ask questions, and hope to help them stumble upon the solution on their own.

The authority I can demonstrate comes from confidence of purpose. I believe in what I’m doing to grow the business. Every day I wonder if it’s the right thing to do and whether I’ll actually succeed at it, but I do believe in what I’m doing. With that confidence, I can declare what the company is, what we do, how we do it, and invite a candidate to participate.

I’ve worked really hard to have the confidence to show who I am.

To not be afraid that doing so will send friends and customers running in the other direction. To be bold enough to be authentic.

I’m not surprised Hollie recognizes me for who I am. She’s one of the reasons I have this new  confidence. Her self expression, authenticity, and independence are all traits I deeply admire. Traits I love seeing reflected back at me.

I used to think credibility is what built confidence. But it’s love.


  1. Wonderful blog post. It's amazing how children are more intuitive than we give them credit for.

    1. Thanks for stopping by Clemson Road, Sopphey! My Hollie is as intuitive as they come. She's constantly reminding me of the little things I miss in daily business. She always seems to remember the right thing at the right time.

  2. I loved Hollie's writing. Repeating for emphasis. Good for her.

    And I loved the fact that you are your true self. It's so easy and so hard.

    Nice Post.

    1. Thanks for visiting, Gail. My dad taught me to be myself and I've held on to that lesson for a long time. More so lately as my fear of imposter syndrome has pushed me toward authenticity.


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